I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
