i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
