I am in a vortex of obligation.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
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