I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
