Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(646): View more from New York

My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay

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(812): View more from Indiana

she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.

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(716): View more from New York

Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend

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(219): View more from Indiana

Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(702): View more from Nevada

If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me

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(270): View more from Kentucky

Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.

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(541): View more from Oregon

He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.

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(410): View more from Maryland

I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol

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