can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
