Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize