I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
