My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
another moral hangover. fuck.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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