maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize