Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
my sisters under your porch take her home
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Randomize
