dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
