I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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