I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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