how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
this will be a night to untag.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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