just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize