why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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