I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
