i just had sex bonerless
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
