no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Randomize
