Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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