How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
