There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
