Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
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