Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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