Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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