just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Randomize
