Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
