I didn't shave. On purpose
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I want to fling myself into the sun
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
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