You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
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