I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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