my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
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