New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
She made me pour olive oil on her.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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