You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
