i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
