He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
