So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
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