Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?

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(203): tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please? http://tfl.nu/hm0j

Replies (8) Good night (2140) Bad night (626)
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(678): View more from Georgia

Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you

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(678): Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you http://tfl.nu/rkl4

Replies (5) Good night (771) Bad night (3080)
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(503): View more from Oregon

i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking

(1-503): View more from Oregon

I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning

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(503): i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking (1-503): I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning http://tfl.nu/mjdo

Replies (14) Good night (4900) Bad night (864)
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(416): View more from Toronto

We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?

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(416): We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard? http://tfl.nu/skft

Replies (12) Good night (5993) Bad night (1011)
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(206): View more from Washington

I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia

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(206): I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia http://tfl.nu/go1o

Replies (6) Good night (2735) Bad night (1296)
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(850): View more from Florida

I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea

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(850): I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea http://tfl.nu/d42k

Replies (18) Good night (5847) Bad night (1098)
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(406): View more from Montana

Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink

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(406): Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink http://tfl.nu/w6xd

Replies (5) Good night (1949) Bad night (786)
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(954): View more from Florida

in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.

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(954): in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume. http://tfl.nu/xcgb

Replies (8) Good night (3575) Bad night (718)
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(970): View more from Colorado

I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.

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(970): I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message. http://tfl.nu/3foq

Replies (6) Good night (2056) Bad night (655)
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(301): View more from Maryland

He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.

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(301): He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis. http://tfl.nu/pct3

Replies (10) Good night (1063) Bad night (2144)
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(616): View more from Michigan

She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday

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(616): She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday http://tfl.nu/c1kw

Replies (5) Good night (1276) Bad night (635)
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(712): View more from Iowa

I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.

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(712): I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex. http://tfl.nu/brxy

Replies (3) Good night (1159) Bad night (484)
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(404): View more from Georgia

He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.

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(404): He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie. http://tfl.nu/bwlf

Replies (3) Good night (515) Bad night (942)
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(626): View more from California

Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why

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(626): Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why http://tfl.nu/74jl

Replies (4) Good night (1428) Bad night (377)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.

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(860): Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie. http://tfl.nu/hffy

Replies (7) Good night (327) Bad night (458)

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