The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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