so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
