My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Randomize
