Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
my shit smells like andre
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
