My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
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