I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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