im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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