talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Drunk is a universal language darling
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