she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
