so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
