He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
