Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
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I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
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I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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