He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
